HANGING ON THREADS // SMA AWARENESS

Sometimes I feel like I am wasting my days. I sit at work waiting to go home and I sit at home waiting to go to work. A drowning little cycle of life glued together with smiles from Adam and groans from Lola. What’s for dinner tonight? We ask. What was for dinner last night?

I’m not complaining in the least bit. The slow simple life does me well. It opens up space for things like this blog, filled with quiet little ramblings and photos of life as it is, but then it opens up space for other things as well. Things like thoughts and thoughts like Logan.

Little Logan who was with us for less than a year; little Logan who died too young, but who is to judge that. I often find myself questioning little Logan’s purpose. Why my family? What does it mean? What should I learn from this?

Should I learn that life is hard, unexpected, straight out spiteful?

Should I learn that life is short, transient, and fleeting?

And so I eat sleep wake, eat sleep wake, sometimes that’s all you can do. That and hang onto threads. That and breathe. That and remember.

Today Logan would have been 2 years old. Happy Birthday Little Loge! A little man, in life, in death, in remembrance he has taught me more than I could have imagined.  

DIY iPHONE SPARKLE CASE // HOW TO

What you'll need:

Modpodge
Clear i-phone case
Paint brush
Glitter

Directions:

Paint a layer of Mod Podge on the inside of the case.
Sprinkle on glitter.
Allow to dry 1 -2 hours.
Add another layer of Mod Podge.
Allow to dry overnight.
Fini! Sport your new glitter case around town.

WHERE IT HURTS THE MOST - REMEMBERING LOGAN // SMA AWARENESS

When you lose a loved one, it often takes many years to grieve over their death, or at least that’s what I’m learning. I’m also learning that you never quite forget.

I lost my nephew a little over a year ago on February 8^th, 2012. I can still remember that day frozen in my mind like a photograph. There's not a day that goes by that I don’t think of him, his baby blue eyes, blond baby hair, and sweet little smile. I think of him the way he should be thought of and not laying frozen in that coffin. That is no bed for a baby. (Sorry for the morbidity. It’s just truth.)

In case you haven’t been reading since then my nephew passed away from a genetic disorder called Spinal Muscular Atrophy. He was almost 11 months old. He had two little baby teeth breaking through the skin in his lower jaw. He has a sister that smothered him with kisses and called him Loge (pronounced like Logan without the an).  He couldn’t move his arms, legs, neck, back or any voluntary muscle for that matter, but he could smile, big, beautiful and bright. Read about SMA here, here, here or here.

These days I have been thinking about him a lot, not only because it’s been a year since his death and on March 21, 2013 he would have been two years old and because my sister is having another baby at the end of March, and because my co-worker just had a baby and named him Logan, but also because each year we raise money in his honor in a one-mile community walk. Each year we remind the community about SMA and that it’s real. That SMA is the number 1 genetic killer of children under 2 years of age. That medical centers are very unaware of this disease and that there is no cure, but that you can help.

If you’d like to find out more about how you can help and what I do to raise awareness click here or like Loving Logan for SMA on facebook and help us spread the word about SMA. The worst thing is not knowing that it could happen to you.